Fat Lute

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Found among the artifacts that the Great Drake Aisha'Taria had claimed ownership of throughout the centuries, this unique Lute appears to be very Fat indeed.

Crafted from an Amber Steelwood, this Fat Lute appears to serve a dual purpose: The first is, most obviously, as a very unique musical instrument, shaped like a pear that has been sliced lengthwise that features a neck with a fretted fingerboard that is bent just below the tuning pegs. In this regard, the Fat Lute is generally unremarkable. Of course, the craftsmanship that has gone into making this lute is of legendary and, indeed, epic proportions, for the lute itself is flawless, and embodies perfection into every aspect of its design.

The music that it can produce when in the hands of a talented Bard is also otherworldly in nature; the strings of the instrument seem to have been woven from Seraphite, ensuring that they shall never snap or requiring tightening, thus remaining perpetually taught.

The harmonics of the lute are also astoundingly beautiful, perhaps thanks to just how fat this lute is, though also - one might suspect - due to the evidently now extinct timber that it is crafted from. However, the second purpose is what makes the Fat Lute so remarkable: Being made from Amber Steelwood, the instrument is as deadly as a Warhammer, and because of how light it is, can be wielded in the same manner.

Indeed, should the bard that owns the Fat Lute ever find themselves in danger, they need merely grab the weapon by the neck, and bludgeon people to death with it until they go away.

Evidently, the Bards that lived before the Cataclysm had the same trouble with unappreciative audiences as the ones that live today do. Perhaps this was because the parties those Bards grouped with were only ever after the Bard's Fat Lute...

• Status: Owned by Taran Songbird.